I am a 5-year-old dog trader. I’m raking in billions. Sorry. The world’s highest-earning dog. Since 2016, I’ve been called a charismatic consultant for binary options. Sorry. Of course I’m a dog, so I like females. Sorry. I wear a mask, but if you take it off, I’m incredibly popular. It’s to ward off gays. Sorry. Sometimes I run a company when I remove the mask. It’s related to apparel. Sorry. I’m also involved in environmental projects. Sorry. I’m not selling anything in particular. I deliver extremely useful lectures. To all the bottom-barrel consultants, I’m sorry. I’ll deliver blunt, funny, and useful lectures. Honestly, I’m more confident than anything. Please refrain from protests. Sorry. I’m a strange dog, but if you watch my videos you’ll understand.